Sunday, August 20, 2006

"Samuel Jackson tasers snakes in the face like he's doing his taxes."

Snakes On A Plane is proof that in this world, there remain things that are pure and good. I believe this movie will go down in history for its complete lack of bullshit. When you enter the theatre (and you will, my friend, you will) you should be hoping, dreaming, longing, yearning for one thing and one thing only: snakes. Snakes on a plane. This movie is about snakes on a plane, and nothing else. It fakes you out a little, pretends to be about moral decisions or a battle between good and evil, but when the lights go up and the curtain falls, you will realize that in this entire movie, there is only one thing. There is a plane, and it is filled with snakes.

This movie delivers. Oh god it delivers. In honor of this movie, no other movie should ever be allowed to portray anything on anything. Robbers on a train? Moose on a highway? Congressmen on a helicopter? Seagulls on a beach?


I mean, come on. This one guy puts a snake in the microwave. Come on.



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