Sunday, March 01, 2009

A Birthday Recap, for the Morbidly Curious

000: Ding! It's my birthday. I'm playing D&D, and there's nothing I'd rather be doing.
0230: Gale the Elven Ranger gets his head torn off by Regiarax the dragon. This is all I really wanted for my birthday.
0330: The game wraps up. My apartment is a mess - I stagger off to bed.
1000: I wake up and stumble towards the bathroom - Eric is cleaning it, which is odd, but I occasionally have random cleaning jags, so it's not that weird.
1015: The bathroom is cleaned. I use the toilet. It clogs and floods. Fuck.
1020: Plunging fails. I start mopping up the overflow with paper towels, then give up and call maintenance, who presumedly own a mop (unlike me). I tell Eric about these developments; he tells me that he had a similar problem previously, hence the early morning cleaning. Fuck fuck fuck.
1030: I shower downstairs in 203. Later, Meggie will tell me that my soap smells nice, and I won't realize what she's talking about for a long, long time.
1115: I start cleaning the kitchen from last night's festivities. The dishes are innumerable and gross, but I have no one to blame but myself - I put on a New Pornographers album and dig in.
1215: I finish cleaning. Eric and I chat about last night's game, and I begin telling him about last night's epic battle.
1220: The maintenance guy arrives - it's just a guy wearing jeans, sneakers, and a jacket, and carrying a plunger, no other tools or equipment. He opens the door to the bathroom.
"It's flooded."
"Yeah, I mentioned that on the phone."
He goes over and flushes the toilet, which promptly floods, doubling the volume of the water on the floor.
"The toilet's clogged." What did you expect would happen? He plunges it for a while - it's clear.
"You should take care of that water as soon as possible." Gee, thanks - what am I paying you for? Wait, am I paying you? I don't press the issue, and he leaves. I grab a roll of paper towels, and get to work.
1315: That was unpleasant. Eric kindly helped, and I finished telling him the THRILLING STORY of last night's session. He suggests that we take this opportunity to watch The Fountain - he's been suggesting that we do this for some time. "After my bike ride," I agree, but around then Zach returns from the first leg of the Saturday morning shopping trip. He's got an RA event, so I need to cover the second leg. No problem, I love grocery shopping.
1500: Well, that took longer than expected. Jack and I discuss housing - our lead looks promising, and she might be willing to negotiate on the summer rent. I buy some Girl Scout cookies from a troop outside the grocery store, and marvel at the physical and social awkwardness of preteen girls.
1505: Time to get some work done - I pull out some REU applications and start filling them out. Fortunately, they're not due until... later today. So much for that bike ride.
1530: I talk to my parents. Hooray! It's my birthday! The mailroom seems intent on withholding any and all birthday presents - this upsets me more than I let on.
1600: Myself, Eric, and others settle in to watch The Fountain.
1745: Wow, what an incredible movie. I kind of want to watch Requiem for a Dream and Pi now, but I'm too scared - drug use and math make me nervous.
1800: Jack has bad news - Sean can't afford the house, and he's dropping out of the deal. Unless we can find a sixth person in short order, we're right fucked. In my heart, I was already moved in - I contain my tears.
1815: Sully comes over. He brought me a present! Fantastic! I try to be appreciative, but I'm still really upset about the house. I realize this, and make an excuse about calling Ben - I go into my room and lie down, and start crying. I just want to have a place to live, and not have to worry about it anymore. I start feeling that I've wasted the day - I didn't even go on a bike ride that I've been promising myself all week. At this point, it's almost too much for me to handle.
1820: I actually call Ben. This helps a lot. I talk about housing, and how I'm doing poorly academically, and about many other things - he listens patiently and sympathetically, like the good brother he is.
1930: I hang up, feeling much better. Liz is over! I love Liz. We go downstairs, where Jack is making wings.
2030: I have eaten a lot of wings.
2130: Liz and I are wrestling on the floor. Before you get any ideas, let me assure you that this is an act of pure violence on our behalf, the consequence of my attempt to break up another argument of moral relativism vs. moral absolutism between her and Zach. I've got forty pounds on her, but damn, she's scrappy. She tells me that putting her in a chokehold is illegal, w.r.t. wrestling rules - I didn't realize there were rules to beating the bejeezus out of people.
2230: We're teaching Jwatzman how to take off a bra. This is possibly the most useful thing he will learn in his entire undergraduate career.
2330: Good friends, good food, and they got me a cake! I have the best friends ever. I make a wish and blow out the candles.
2359: The party isn't over yet, but I started at 0000, so I should end here. Besides, we all go home pretty soon in the future anyway.

So there you have it - a perfectly lovely birthday. Definitely within the top 20. I am among friends here, dear friends, and don't you forget it.

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Blogger olddockeller said...

It is good to have friends. Happy Birthday, Josh.

5:51 AM  

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